Film Review: The Back-Up Plan

J. Lo, J Lo, J Lo. Wow. You have fallen down the totem pole. This film is easily the biggest pile of trite I have seen all year. Atroticous.

Jennifer Lopez plays Zoe, who has become pregnant and starts dating Stan (Alex O'Loughlin) who is unaware of Zoe's pregnant condition.

The story is like spam, the acting like balsa wood and the characters as thin as twine, The Back-Up Plan would make make Martin corsese wonder what happened to the great medium called cinema. With one-liners that are relying solely on shock value, it won't make you gasp. It'll make you realize just how depserate these guys are to make you laugh. Hopefully, J. Lo gets a role next time that, you know, has one reddeming quality.

Rating: 2.8 out of 10 or F

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Blu-Ray Review: Did You Hear About The Morgans?

DYHATM is a bad film. Not Chipmunks bad...but bad anyways. It just stretches for laughs and feels convulated and thrown together.

Meryl Judith Morgan and Paul Michael Morgan are a couple on the verge of breaking up...until they witness a murder and are forced to stay together thanks to a witness protection program. Now in the country, they'll have to survive the outdoors...and each other.

This film has nary a funny moment (a good Palin joke is ruined in the trailer) and the film is just rushed throughout with a feeling of no conclusion. In a way, the movie just rushes around, hoping for money and laughs to come. But they never do. Hugh Grant looks bored and Sarah Jessica Parker is obviously faking that smile she has on. As usual, Sam Elliot does what he can with this material. But even this country boy can't keep this floppy "comedy" afloat.

Rating: 5.0 out of 10 or D+

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DVD Reivew: Gentlemen Broncos

Napolean Dynamite. Is there any other 21st Century film that is so well-known? Like Avatar and all the PIXAR films, it's lingo and messages resonate with all who watch it. So it's a real shame that director's newest project comes off as TOO weird and...just plain odd.

Utahan Benjamin Pervis is a teenager who wants to be a fantasy writer. When he gets to submit his publication to his favorite author, he plagiarizes it and makes it his own story. Meanwhile, we get to see the story come to life through little bits and pieces with the main book character being played by Sam Rockwell.

To say the film is tricky and weird is an understatement. To says it beyond confusing and patience-trying wouldn't be that much of a hyperbole. The film doesn't really let you get to know the characters and the book film is just..odd. Sam is great, but he falls here and Jermanie Clements does do well at all here as the plagiarizing writer. He's the only one though tat, you know, does anything. Combine bored actors with gallons of bathroom humour and you can see why this is one sloppy production.

Rating: 4.8 out of 10 or D+

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